Rest in peace, you lucky rascal!

MF Hussain is dead.  He did live bloody long.  Freaking 95 years!  That's a helluva lot longer than most Indians manage.  And, he led a charmed life, doing what he wanted.

For some reason, a lot of people have expressed that he was somehow shortchanged by an intolerant India.

http://www.thehindu.com/opinion/lead/article2091330.ece

A nation has moral dilemmas when it has to chart a course to a new existence, accept a grave mistake, or when it reaches a cathartic moment in its history.  Has MF Hussain contributed to any significant moment of India's history?  Not one that I can remember.

Somehow nobody seems to remember that it was INDIA that produced MF Hussain, and it was INDIA that gave him the platform for him to be himself for 70 odd years.  He was our celebrated artist when he was doing horses.  Nobody understood what all the critics were neighing about, but we accepted that after Raja Ravi Varma and some other great artists that everybody can understand easily was great, here was a modern artist that perhaps normal people could not understand, but everybody had to appreciate.

We DID appreciate his shit for a long time, some out of some artistic sensibility that could tolerate the abstract, and the rest out of respect for an old man.  In India, everybody has the freedom to bullshit everybody else and sell a lot of bullshit too!  Nobody bothered Hussain for his caricatures and his lousy art.  Of course this is just an opinion.  Let us assume for a moment that he was indeed a great artist.  Clearly he is no Picasso.  He is no Van Gogh.  So he is a level below those greats?  Okay, so we still haven't produced any true great so we have this guy MF.  That's fine.  When we have no stallions or horses, a donkey can fill in for the post of Fastest Indian On Hooves!  Since India could not tolerate this great artist, why not look at how well the rest of the world was dying for his awesome talent?  So, how good is this guy?  Considering how much he could sell in an international art exhibition, pretty shit.  So, first and fucking foremost, let's accept this guy wasn't any great shit with his art.  I don't understand Mark Rothko either, but his window pane crap sells for millions.  MF Hussain's crap doesn't do even thousands.  In the world of art, he ain't shit, this MF.

All art is appreciated by those who like it.  Some can be made to like it with a lot of bullshit marketing around it.  Modern art has no measuring scale.  I can draw a long straight line and a short straight line, and it can be my interpretation of a fighter plane leaving an aircraft carrier or a male orangutan ejaculating.  I am free to do any of that, and if you like it, you can buy it.  For a long time, people did buy MF Hussain's work.  The guy made a living through his art.  Considering how good he became at this, he was more than making a living.  He was making a killing!

Again, this is purely opinion, but since it is established that he is not amongst the best in the world, we can call his work SHIT.  If a cricketer can be cursed as SHIT for not performing as part of our world champion cricket team, surely, a nobody in world standards can be cursed as SHIT.  But a lot of Indian fools bought his rubbish work and paid him a fair bit for it.  Was he grateful?  He probably was, for there is no evidence the old coot was not.

Then came his controversial crap.  For those of you who don't know what that "Shwetambari" fiasco was, he threw open an exhibition of his under this name, with absolutely nothing but plain white canvasses.  Shwetambari is a celebration of white, get it?  I think the crusty bastard had a sense of humour!  Who can't hang plain canvasses?  But it takes a conman SHIT artist like MF Hussain to pull a con like this, and give it a name!  India did tolerate this, even gave him credit for doing something artistic.

I don't have a problem with super liberal, experimental, modern, edgy, controversial artists and their creative exhibitions and expressions, if they are not trying to make money or making a living from it.  As soon as they depend on the world outside for reactions, appreciation and money, they should know that along with appreciation, they might get some brickbats.  Sometimes, the criticism may not be as simple as, "I'm not paying for that SHIT!". 

I am all for freedom too.  But even for playing loud music, which is my freedom, I suppose, there is a limit where my neighbours cannot sleep.  Now, I'm not asking my neighbours to pay for it, so they probably won't get mad at me beyond telling me to keep it down.  This is purely social contract.  It is not my intent either to get them mad at me.  I really have no business offending them. 

What people can be offended by is wide in variety.  However, a person's religion is deeply personal sometimes.  It is hard not to offend someone when you make a statement, however open to interpretation, that runs counter to all perceptions held sacred in that religion.  It's not hard to see why practising Christians could get mad if I say, "Jesus was a pedophile!".  There will be a few who would just say, "You're mad!" and move on, but if I stood in front of a Church and shout, "Jesus was a pedophile!", it is likely to get some pretty strong reactions.  I should be intelligent enough to know when the line from opinion to offense is crossed.

If an 80+ year old man, after living in India for most of it, does not know he will offend people of the Hindu faith by drawing Hindu goddesses nude, and that too with his SHIT quality of art, then he isn't just a fool, he is a distilled moron.  If he should not be jailed for offensive artistic expression leading to religious and social disharmony, he should be contained from being a lunatic causing nuisance.  So, pretty please, if this kind of moron wants to leave the country, we should be very happy to see the average IQ of our nation's residents go up in one shot.  Book the guy on the first flight out!

It was MF Hussain's choice to leave this country, only AFTER the reactions he got to his work.  If an artist is free to express whatever s/he wishes, then the reactions must have the same expressional freedom.  India allowed those reactions too, like a true democracy.  What is everyone complaining about?

And then, which country did he go to?  Did he go to a country that is known for great artistic freedom?  No!  He went to Qatar!  Not a secular country, but a Muslim country!  Is this just a coincidence?  I can understand Qatar must be happy that there is at least one Muslim in the world of contemporary art - kind of like the one cross country skier India had at the Winter Olympics.  Who cares if he is any good?  He's got our flag there!  Make some noise!  Chances are, those Qatari rascals must have perceived some value in a guy who could get all the fundamental Hindus riled up. So, pretty please, Qatar, keep this son of our horse shit and his remains.

I'm all for a guy who had his fun, lived a full life, enjoyed the blessings of the journey, and tried his best to be a good artist.  But if he got into trouble for being stupid, for being insensitive, I don't have a problem if he got dragged down to earth by a bunch of hooligans.  Someone had to do it.  Resentment doesn't wait 70 years in most cases.  India has been mighty patient.   So, enough already about not treasuring this fool.

MF Hussain was a celebrity just because he fulfilled to some extent India's home grown pseudo liberal farts' need for someone to throw hurrahs at.  Most of them wouldn't recognize art from a horse's ass.  Except maybe, that of one of the horses MF did.

- BSK.

Against all greatness

Knowing fully well that The Hindu is a better paper, what makes some of us reach for The Times of India? When both papers are right in front of us, all things considered, The Hindu should never have to compete with The Times of India. Yet, there is a place for sub standard, mediocre, and absolutely crappy product in every sphere! How do we let this happen, even when there are no financial ramifications involved?

How do we voluntarily choose to watch song and dance programmes on television, when it is on plain view that neither is the talent on display so breathtaking, nor is the format of the programme all that exciting? Quite simply, we have a great amount of space reserved for the mindless, for the easy access "fun" experience, which can take us from one moment to another, without having to tax our minds. This can be therapeutic once in a while, but when we put up with sub standard all the time, we are on a slippery slope.

Visit the Madras Boat Club and you will find fairly elite people enjoying dinner on the lawn at the back, facing the river. If you were smelling impaired, you'd have the greatest time, but whatever is wrong with these morons that they would completely ignore the stench of the river which is nothing but sewage?! It is unbearable and most sane people would run from that stink, but for the members of the MBC, no problem! That's the amazing part - it is as if it is normal to pay a lot of money to experience dinner with the huge stench of sewage all around!

There was a question in the Indian media asking where our Obama was. A bit of a stretch, perhaps, considering Senator Obama is yet unproven, but the signs of a visionary leader are there. The signs of greatness are there without doubt. So, if there is an Obama amongst us in India, we have to kill him early, and nothing succeeds like India stifling any and all attempts at greatness, no matter who it is putting the effort. We love to pull everyone down to the average, below standard level, so that we can all be in a level playing field. India is one of the few countries that still genuinely believes in making it as hard as possible to be great. Collectively, we hate it when someone forces us to set higher standards for ourselves.

A few weeks ago, I called 139 to find the status of my train, and got an automated voice telling me it was on time. I went to the station on time and found the train was a hundred minutes late. I was furious, for what is the point of having this automated system if I cannot get accurate information? A hundred minutes of my time is valuable, but more than that, the lousy maintenance of the system is no excuse for stealing a hundred minutes of my time! I duly filled out a complaint, in triplicate as the Railways have it, and got a sympathetic railway official who gave me another local number to call to get "reliable" information! This is the problem I have with India - we never seem to make intent and action meet.

We celebrate chaos and we love being out of order. It is all great if this order we are fighting against is one of extreme regimen, and we are losing our minds and our freedom, but completely to the contrary, we do have a lot of freedom! We have so much freedom in this country that we don't have to perform up to snuff in anything we do. The few of us who choose to be great at what we do, have to do whatever it is that we do in complete insulation from everybody else, because we don't encourage any attempt at being great at anything, unless it is close to bringing a windfall bonus!

Even the educated amongst us eat at unhygienic places, do not demand basic sanitary standards out of our all encompassing logic that there is no point, and almost consider it unfashionable to take action against the ever ready low minded unthinking mediocrity worshipper that can and will affect our lives negatively. The bus that plays a movie way too loudly absolutely beckons us to walk up to the driver and tell him to put down the volume. In extreme cases, I have had to cut the wire to the speaker directly above me, and damn the loss in entertainment value the other deaf passengers have to endure! Sometimes, we have to be militant about keeping our sanity. The truth is, you pay for a bus ride, not for the noise, and you bloody well have a right to a peaceful journey.

The Indian government machinery is famous for recruiting low minds, and absolute morons. When there is a quota system designed to infuse the system with underperforming idiots, who won't be fired if they don't perform, this is to be expected. But on our side of the coin, we have every right to demand that they perform. The right to complain is something we should not have to think twice about, but given that we put up with a mediocre system, there is absolutely no need for us to be stuck with the faults of idiots who can stall our normal conduct of life. The Right to Information is a great right, but only when exercised.

At all levels when you demand information that is not forthcoming, you are bound to meet an attempt to intimidate you, either through a low mind government servant that throws attitude or ignores you until you make it unbearable. And then, your decency will come under question, with the underlying hope that somehow you will not be willing to let go of a little dignity, and will therefore "behave" when you don't get the service you deserve. Sloths who work for the government think it is their birthright to not perform, and act as if you are acting way above your authority when you ask them to simply do their jobs. Why do we put up with fools like this? Because we love them!

We in India have this enormous empathy for the underperforming sloth, unless he is a cricketer. That is the one uniform that carries a lot of responsibility. The cricketer must be an all conquering, intense, positive, world class performer with attitude to boot! Everybody else is allowed to graze on the plateau of collective pathos. Why is it that we demand so little for ourselves when it isn't hard to do so? Do we love so much to be backward? Or is it our discomfort with the pursuit of greatness because it demands that we get off our lazy butts and become active?

Fact remains that we love to belong in some kind of greatness, as long as we don't have to work for it. Our five thousand year old heritage is the biggest culprit in breeding this lethargy in us. Who can take that away from us? Nobody, and that is the problem! What work does it take for us to lay claim to having one of the greatest civilizations in our ancestry? Nothing! What joy! But, what are we willing to do to make India work better today? What can we do to make our lives better? Forget the patriotism and nationalist nonsense - it isn't worth the sweat. It is worth the sweat to have our system work properly, atleast for most essential part. Let's forget about the thousands of years of our forefathers' legacy that is supposed to be all bathed in glory. That is part of this land, not part of our lives, our nation or our realities today.

What India is today is a herd. A herd of mindless, selfish, uncaring, unspiritual individuals who don't really care about anything remotely reaching greatness. We have no place for original thought, no tolerance for brilliance, unless that brilliance is unstoppable and already at its pinnacle of achievement. And then, we have our cynicism towards over achievers, only too eager to find faults in individuals who have taken their passion seriously and climbed their own peaks. We are a negative lot, finding humour in failure, comfort in low thought processes. We'd rather be led than show the courage to beat our own paths. This is the reason we will be badly affected by shifting paradigms, that other people control, for good or bad.

We are happy to be defined by others, by trends, by messages that subtly alter the way we think. The Indian today is one whose character can be palpably demonstrated by the way the vehicles on our roads have become extensions of our egos. We are always one step away from becoming a mob, because we revel in our little triumphs when there is no risk to our own status quo. We are vastly available to an injection of collective stupidity. We love rumours because our lives aren't that interesting anyway. We discuss other people because our minds have a hard time discussing ideas. At best, we discuss events, because we have the time.

Aha! Time! That is the big one! We just have the time to remain stagnant - no wonder we allow stagnation. We are not in a hurry to get anywhere beyond where we are. We are sedentary but not content, inactive but unhappy. We would like to ensure as much safety as possible to be built around the coccoon of mediocrity that we have mired ourselves in. What can be better than to be unaware? Ignorance has been bliss for a long, long time. It is proven and it is tested against everything. So, we choose to be ignorant.

So, what does an Indian contribute to life on earth as humans? What goes in comes out. We swallow mediocrity by the ton, and spit it out. This shouldn't surprise anyone, for just as we don't mind corruption, we condone laziness, incompetence, and generally do whatever it takes to avoid friction. We are weighed down by our legacy, burdened by our glorious past, and we refuse to come to the present where we don't really count for much. We are the rat race. But then, we are great Indian rats! See, one of us is by Lord Ganesh himself!